During coitus, Adam realized he was destined to live many lives. He's been a cosmonaut, a cosmopolitan, an alligator wrestler, and a dog food taster (self-employed). He made very little money but invested it all in an on-line tutorial on stripping. Now stripping can be as easy as taking off your clothes.

Wanting to make people laugh all his life he started drinking and realized he was funnier when he was "deep-throating long necks". His sense of humor caught the eye of a prostitute named "Booty" Betty. Together they became the leaders of a dope-smoking cult called "The Dope- Smoking Cult." After years of dope-smoking Adam turned to other drugs like Robotussin and Night Quill. He hasn't been the same since.

Mr. Martinez is a hardheaded individual who enjoys moonlit tans and melted ice cream. He only has one dream: to obtain a lifetime supply of cheese-balls (that's cocaine and cheese).